Conversation Norms and Attention-Getting in Deaf Culture
Conversation management in ASL and Deaf culture operates differently from spoken-language norms in several important ways. Getting someone's attention — the equivalent of saying "hey" or tapping someone on the shoulder in hearing contexts — uses visual and tactile strategies because calling out is ineffective. Appropriate attention-getting methods include: a gentle tap on the shoulder (one or two taps, not repeated tapping), waving in peripheral vision, turning lights on and off briefly in a room, or having a third person tap the target individual. Direct tapping on the arm is appropriate between peers; touching the head or face is not. Understanding these norms is not just etiquette — using inappropriate attention-getting signals marks a learner as culturally uninformed.
Turn-taking in ASL conversation uses visual signals rather than the auditory cues speakers use to manage overlapping talk. Yielding a turn involves slowing and reducing sign size, lowering the dominant hand, and directing gaze toward the conversation partner. Taking a turn involves a small preparatory movement or increase in sign size that signals upcoming contribution. Holding a turn — maintaining the floor while gathering thoughts — can be done with a filled hold (maintaining the last handshape or position) or a continuation signal. Interrupting, when appropriate, involves placing the hands near the other signer's signing space and signing with visible initiation energy; this is a more direct visual signal than verbal interruption.
Eye contact norms in Deaf culture also differ from hearing norms. Direct, sustained eye contact is normal and expected in ASL conversation — it is the equivalent of maintaining a listening posture. Looking away repeatedly is rude and signals inattention. However, during role shifts in storytelling, a signer's gaze will naturally change as they inhabit different characters' perspectives; this is grammatical, not conversationally disengaging.